Midlife necessities

Midlife necessities
Midlife necessities

Friday, October 3, 2014

Mini Meltdown

Just a quick post to let you know that I do have my moments.

Monday night after my first chemo was a little rough. I probably shouldn't have had KFC for dinner, and maybe the garlic fries for lunch weren't such a good idea either. Oops. I am so grateful that the anti-nausea meds have worked great but I did experience heartburn and headache all night and on Tuesday. I am able to take Tums so I popped those suckers, and now I am more careful about what I eat. No spicy or greasy. My bff and I made fish and rice on Tuesday night, and I made a creamy chicken, mushroom pasta dish on Wednesday. Much better. But I whined while I was cooking because I couldn't have wine. Sometimes I like to have a glass of wine while I cook a nice meal, and I was feeling sorry for myself that I won't be able to do that for MONTHS.

My second shower incident went much more smoothly. The Press'n Seal that my bff bought me worked SO MUCH better than regular plastic wrap. I still had to blow dry my bandage but it didn't get nearly as wet. No mad tears this time.

My wonderful parents were here doing projects around the house and in the yard. I felt a bit slow, but generally pretty darn good. But sometimes a bit grumpy. And then it was time for the first self-injection.

I had a fit. I didn't want to do it. I removed a syringe from the fridge a half hour before injection so it could come to room temperature, and I took some Tylenol. I had asked four people if they would give me the shot, and all said they would. I had back-ups for the back-ups. My bff was first in line, and asked me, "Are you ready?" I proceeded to burst into tears! Just the idea of an injection in the stomach made me cry. It was quick, and didn't really hurt until afterward. I was not expecting my reaction.

Yesterday, Injection #2. Same prep, same outcome. I started crying before anything even happened. This time the shot hurt going in. My bff felt really bad. I felt really bad. The whining started. "I have 18 more shots in the stomach to go! I haven't even had the Broviac for a week and I have to flush this stupid thing twice a day until it comes out in MARCH! I have to put this wrap on my chest every time I want to shower...until MARCH! Pretty soon I'll be BALD!!!!!" Yeah, it went from bad to worse. 

Today is a new day. I figured out how much tape to use on the Press'n Seal and my dressing stayed dry in the shower. I have not needed to take anti-nausea meds today. I feel good enough to drive myself to Kaiser for my dressing change. Verse for today, "Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances..." (1 Thess 5:16-18)

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